***maybe this is only a product of my imagination…
01.31.11
He was such a distraction!
I was working on a communication letter for the Technical Review and Presentation of FS and DED of the proposed communal irrigation system when he came near me. He was just standing right behind where I was sitting, just watching. There really was nothing special on that because he used to do that to everyone else. He would just hover, be watching over what it was you were doing. Like I always said, it was nothing on his part but it affected me that much. His mere presence could make me immobilize. He could make my mind freeze! He could make my mind go completely blank. I usually could not think of anything other than his presence whenever he was around. He was such a distraction I totally loved! 
02.04.11
They miss something!
We have an officemate whom they have often paired me to. The guy is unattached like me. I used to like him before but for some reason that soon-to-be special feeling died so instantly. My officemates are thinking I like the guy but I don’t anymore. I can be misleading when I want to. I may seem to like that guy but it is just a cover-up. They are under my pretenses because it really is HIM, not him. I am such a good actress, am I not?
02.10.11
Suspicion…
My psyche was telling me a suspicion was brewing into Her head. She kinda had an inkling whom I was referring to when I told a confidant with a simple “YOU KNOW WHO” and this was confirmed just this afternoon. My confidant warned me not to “always” hitchhike with HIM because it was starting to get obvious in their eyes! Ugh! It was as if I were under scrutiny! She began wondering why I would choose HIM among others. I got used to it and got used to him. But as much as I want to get next to HIM, I have to listen to my friend. So from now on, I promise to choose anyone but him when I need a ride. I promise to pretend hard he does not exist at all.
02.10.11
Putting me to a test again?
Our boss called us for a meeting. After almost an hour, HE (not our boss of course.LOL) sat beside me. I should have moved to give enough space between us but I didn’t. I mean, I did but not enough to avoid possible contact with each other! It turned out, it was as if I were glued on my seat just wanting to be close to him. Our legs would even sometimes brush each other. That was how close we were. I’m not a hypocrite to say I was not aware of His presence. I was. In fact, I could feel him and maybe he felt the same way. Perhaps that was why he would sometimes cross his legs so he could avoid the contact. Ugh! I knew the right thing to do was to keep a distance but I just moved a bit! My mind said “Move farther! Or better go out!” but my heart opposed and instructed me not to! I was torn between doing the right thing and doing what would make me happy. However, amidst the excitement, my instinct was telling me he was trying to prove something. A suspicion was building up and he was just trying to gauge my feelings towards him by reading my subtle reactions…
***Till next time! Happy reading!(UNEDITED)
whoooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa awful feelings… beware, it’s deadly!!!